There are so many things that I still don’t understand and at times they seems to much to bare. Sometimes I don’t understand why I am the way I am. And then I loose what I really want because I don’t understand. There is a few people who I have opened up too more then anyone ever before and they are gone and now I am left to wonder why…Did I ssay something wrong or is it because they felt they were getting to close and they didn’t want to get hurt. I don’t understand why we as human beings just can’t share who we really are without that fear of being hurt. 

What movies and real life have to do with the way you think things should happen. I just watch Easy A and if any of you ever seen it this will make a lot of since to you and for those who have not seen it well bare with me for a minute……

Have you ever said something just to stut someone up whether it was true or not? And as soon as you do it spreads like wild fire and then you feel like you should have just walked away. At times in life there are situations that we as typically human beings will do or say something just so we can say “yea I did” that and pay the consequences. But when it comes rigt down to it the only person you are hurting is you.Who cares what other people will say who care what happens if they find out you lied……..Right.

So think about this the next time you want to say you did something or didnt do something…Why are you hurting you and what are you going to do when you are the one who gets lied to…..

Just a thought

I have a story to tell. It’s a story about a small town girl in a big city world.

“Mandy you can do anything you want all you have to do is believe..” Believe in what exactly she never asked but she always wondered what else is out there and how was she going to find it.

 Time went by and well things changed as they always do, but still that girl always wondered what things would have been like if she truely believed.

 Is it god I am to believe in because I do, is it love I am to believe in because I do, what is it that I am to believe in please someone tell me.

 I have childern now and at times I stop and just listern to what I am saying to them just to make sure I don’t forget to tell them that” I believe in you and so should you…” But to be honest I am not sure that is what they need to hear.

Going back to that little town I grew up in takes me back to those days that believing in something was so much easier then it is today…Why is that?  Is it the way people see the world and it’s possible disappearance.. Is it the fact that GOD seemed to have lost his hand in this thing we call life.

It is always reassuring to me when I read a post where people will say “God has a plan for me” I think his plans are there if we let them be and if we are patient with all those around us maybe then they will believe too, not just in themselves but in all those wonders of life. 

I do believe, I do believe, I believe in you and I believe in the ways of the world….

Ok so if it’s obvious I have no idea what I’m doing but it is fun so far.